Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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