Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
