She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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