Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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