I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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