is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
