So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Sober January is a disaster.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
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She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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