you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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