i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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