i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
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