Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
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