that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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