awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize