So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
