try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Randomize
