am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
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