So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
