you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
Randomize
