Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
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So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
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Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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