No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
