My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
