He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
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