dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life