He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
there is puke in my bra ... again
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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