On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
