Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
