just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize
