escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
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