Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
