so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Randomize
