porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
