she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
