I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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