my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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