if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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