Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
