she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
