physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
