Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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