Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize