census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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