Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
