he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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