singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
