ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
