omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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