I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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