Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
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If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
My vagina is very pro this idea
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize