At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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