Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
