could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
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reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
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GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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